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Review my AWA please
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26 Jun 2019, 06:05
26 Jun 2019, 06:05
Q. A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation & explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
A - The issue states that a nation should have a unified curriculum for all its students under college level. Educational curriculum is a requisite and important factor in students academic success. A comprehensive and enhanced curriculum hones students' ability and acumen. I agree with the recommendation that a nation should have all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
At present, there exists many curricula and boards for the educational institutions i.e schools to select. Following one curriculum pattern for under college students will bring all educational institutions at the same level with respect to academics; there will be a single curriculum to abide and refer to. This will bring equality in the schools' educational mandates and will allay any biases in curriculum management.
Secondly, the same national curriculum will provide a common base to judge students' academically. Every curriculum has different levels of study modules, exam patterns, score structure and level of difficulty. A single national curriculum for students under college will solve this issue and make academics and study level similar for all the students.
Moreover, the same national curriculum will eliminate any pressure on parents to select the best curriculum for their children. A student's application for college level education would be easy and simplified with a national curriculum. Thus, a unified curriculum for under college students will be advantageous, both, to students, educational institutions.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation & explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
A - The issue states that a nation should have a unified curriculum for all its students under college level. Educational curriculum is a requisite and important factor in students academic success. A comprehensive and enhanced curriculum hones students' ability and acumen. I agree with the recommendation that a nation should have all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
At present, there exists many curricula and boards for the educational institutions i.e schools to select. Following one curriculum pattern for under college students will bring all educational institutions at the same level with respect to academics; there will be a single curriculum to abide and refer to. This will bring equality in the schools' educational mandates and will allay any biases in curriculum management.
Secondly, the same national curriculum will provide a common base to judge students' academically. Every curriculum has different levels of study modules, exam patterns, score structure and level of difficulty. A single national curriculum for students under college will solve this issue and make academics and study level similar for all the students.
Moreover, the same national curriculum will eliminate any pressure on parents to select the best curriculum for their children. A student's application for college level education would be easy and simplified with a national curriculum. Thus, a unified curriculum for under college students will be advantageous, both, to students, educational institutions.
GRE Prep Club Tests Editor
Joined: 13 May 2019
Affiliations: Partner at MyGuru LLC.
Posts: 186
Given Kudos: 5
Location: United States
GMAT 1: 770 Q51 V44
GRE 1: Q169 V168
WE:Education (Education)
Re: Review my AWA please
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27 Jun 2019, 06:54
27 Jun 2019, 06:54
Expert Reply
Kaxy wrote:
Q. A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation & explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
A - The issue states that a nation should have a unified curriculum for all its students under college level. Educational curriculum is a requisite and important factor in students academic success. A comprehensive and enhanced curriculum hones students' ability and acumen. I agree with the recommendation that a nation should have all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
At present, there exists many curricula and boards for the educational institutions i.e schools to select. Following one curriculum pattern for under college students will bring all educational institutions at the same level with respect to academics; there will be a single curriculum to abide and refer to. This will bring equality in the schools' educational mandates and will allay any biases in curriculum management.
Secondly, the same national curriculum will provide a common base to judge students' academically. Every curriculum has different levels of study modules, exam patterns, score structure and level of difficulty. A single national curriculum for students under college will solve this issue and make academics and study level similar for all the students.
Moreover, the same national curriculum will eliminate any pressure on parents to select the best curriculum for their children. A student's application for college level education would be easy and simplified with a national curriculum. Thus, a unified curriculum for under college students will be advantageous, both, to students, educational institutions.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation & explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstances in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.
A - The issue states that a nation should have a unified curriculum for all its students under college level. Educational curriculum is a requisite and important factor in students academic success. A comprehensive and enhanced curriculum hones students' ability and acumen. I agree with the recommendation that a nation should have all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college.
At present, there exists many curricula and boards for the educational institutions i.e schools to select. Following one curriculum pattern for under college students will bring all educational institutions at the same level with respect to academics; there will be a single curriculum to abide and refer to. This will bring equality in the schools' educational mandates and will allay any biases in curriculum management.
Secondly, the same national curriculum will provide a common base to judge students' academically. Every curriculum has different levels of study modules, exam patterns, score structure and level of difficulty. A single national curriculum for students under college will solve this issue and make academics and study level similar for all the students.
Moreover, the same national curriculum will eliminate any pressure on parents to select the best curriculum for their children. A student's application for college level education would be easy and simplified with a national curriculum. Thus, a unified curriculum for under college students will be advantageous, both, to students, educational institutions.
Let me begin with the caveat that I personally am a much tougher essay grader than the GRE tends to be, and you can blame my graduate degree in journalism for that, but I would place this somewhere between a 3 and a 4.
First, the good. You clearly articulate a position and provide consistent reasoning for your position throughout the essay. This alone, along with a basic mastery of English guarantees this essay at least a 3.
Now, the less good. You fail to support your reasoning with any tangible examples. You state for instance that "there exists many curricula", but fail to elaborate or provide an example. You also jump to the conclusion that a single curriculum "will bring equality" without much reasoning except the tautological statement itself. Consider brainstorming examples to better support your reasoning.
Lastly, you do not even consider the alternative position as potentially viable to some. All GRE essay prompts will be defensible from either position, so avoid absolute statements and attempt to at least briefly address why someone might believe the opposing viewpoint to better buttress your own position.
Ultimately, the goal for all MBA GRE applicants should be a 4. It is all that will be necessary considering how little interest the admissions officers have in the essay portion of the GRE or the GMAT. Spend a bit more time supporting your essay with examples and at least briefly addressing the opposing viewpoint to guarantee that level score!
Hope this helps, and please let me know if you have any follow up questions.
Re: Review my AWA please
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29 Jun 2019, 04:42
29 Jun 2019, 04:42
Thanke Stefan for taking time to review my essay! Your valuable feedback will help me in better articulation and reaching goal of 5+ in AWA! I was expecting a critical review, so thanks again 
All points noted and will work on adding them and improving my writing. However, my essay is under 250 words; I feel a good +5 essay should be of at least 400 words. Any comments on that?
Looking forward to your feedback on my future AWA.
Cheers
Posted from my mobile device
All points noted and will work on adding them and improving my writing. However, my essay is under 250 words; I feel a good +5 essay should be of at least 400 words. Any comments on that?
Looking forward to your feedback on my future AWA.
Cheers
Posted from my mobile device
