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Re: Please rate my essay. Cooperation vs Competition [#permalink]
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Yes I think thats a good idea. Your kind of writing is quite non-linear which makes it an enjoyable read, but however, scientific writing is quite linear and therefore the metric of judgement is quite different. You should stick to the structured writing you did in IELTS.
Best of luck!
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Re: Please rate my essay. Cooperation vs Competition [#permalink]
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Great essay and I think it has potential. How long do you take to outline what you want to write? I would dedicate some time on that and expand your ideas a bit more before putting them in paragraph form. If you could bump up the length by 20-30%, that would be helpful. You use a lot of idioms and vocab words as well. While this is fine, overdoing it can make it seem more like a novel than an essay, with lots of personal opinions. Also, I would try to address the prompt a bit more, rather than keeping it at a rather high level discussion. A few specific examples would be helpful.

I also responded to this prompt, would appreciate feedback on my thread at greprepclub dot com/forum/manhattan-prep-essays-emotions-and-logic-gmo-millet-2252.html, thanks!
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Re: Please rate my essay. Cooperation vs Competition [#permalink]
I got 5.5 in the end, if anyone is interested. I could actually see a bad mistake I made as the time ran out, but I couldn't click on it fast enough. Because I made it in a highly visible part of the first paragraph, I strongly suspect it knocked the essay down a notch. Oh well, 5.5 is still good. Got 170 on Verbal, too, but the Quant was a little sub-par, so I'll be re-taking the test in September - I'd rather maximise my chances, and I kind of enjoyed the test in a perverse masochistic fashion.

I'd like to thank everyone once again for the suggestions. I was very heavy on examples in my essays. Essentially, I had one intro sentence, and the rest of the paragraph were examples. I had a total of 6 paragraphs for both essays. I decided to gamble for a six and spent no time checking the essay. Since I generally make few mistakes, being an experienced internet warrior, this worked for me.

I also tried ScoreItNow, which actually offers 8 rather than 2 essays, so it is an excellent deal. I got 6 on one issue essay and 5 on everything else. However, I found the programme a little stingy with 6s.
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Re: Please rate my essay. Cooperation vs Competition [#permalink]
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