The question:
People's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your

reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the

statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.


My Essay:

The given statement implies that a person's behavior is largely driven by external forces. Although this statement is

widely used to excuse inappropriate conduct, for example- cheating on your partner is often excused because the accused was

drunk, or not exercising regularly because they can't get the time for it, is incorrect. This isn't to say that we

shouldn't let go of petty issues and hold the person responsible for each and every "hurtful" thing they might have said or

done, or not empathize with people's sufferings, but excusing everything altogether isn't a great idea.


Firstly, people's behavior is primarily determined by their moral values. For instance, Mahatma Gandhi fought long and hard

for India's independence in the 1900s on the values of non-violence with the Non Cooperation Movement and Civil

Disobedience Movement, in which he strictly adhered to a peaceful protests and manufacturing salt (which wasn't allowed for

Indians at that time) in the former movement and asking Indian students and employees to withdraw from British

institutions. This took place at the time after Indians were mercilessly slaughtered at Jalianwala Bagh and treated with

discrimination on a regular basis. He inspired a nation to not give in to their instinct of violence as a reaction to such

gruesome inflictions, and freed India on 15th August 1947. He proved that we can win through the principle of non-violence

even in the most adverse conditions.


Further, decision-making also plays a key role in influencing a person's behavior. Thinking rationally goes a long way in

making correct decisions and keeps our behavior towards people and situation in check. Stephen Hawking is a prime example

of someone who didn't let go of his dreams, even though his situation didn't seem to allow him. He was diagnosed with Motor

Neuron disease in his 20s and was told he had only a few years to live. Instead of giving up on his dreams to become a

physicist and studying the universe, he decided to continue his research till he's alive. It has been years now and he's

still with us enlightning our minds about origins of the universe and researching about the mysteries of black holes, which

he presents in his books in simplified language so that all of us can understand one of the most crucial questions- "Where

did we come from?" If Mr. Hawking would have decided to give up on his life at the time when he was diagnosed, where would

physics be right now? Luckily, we'll never know.


In conclusion, people's behavior is largely determined by their decisions and personal values. Promoting rational thinking

and upholding moral values would improvise people's general behavior towards tough situations and each other, helping them

in realizing that we have the power to control our behavior, despite the circumstances.


PS- Kindly grade the essay on 6. Also, I tend to follow the basic and most common essay structure, should I follow a different structure to ensure more marks? Or does it not matter? Please help. Thanks a lot